GAIN. I'm officially a yo-yo

I'm stressed, y'all.  Not only is life crazy at the moment, but I weighed in today and it looks as if my weight has sky-rocketed back to a pretty scary number. 

It's been such a fast gain this time that I know if I keep on going, my weight would be back to 220 by summer.  So...

Since I don't want that to happen, I will be starting to really think about health again.

Because, right now, I'm mostly concerned with my health.  Yes, I still desire to be thin, not gonna lie.

But it's not my top priority anymore.  I want to stop the Yo-yo cycle for real.

I promised myself this before, at the beginning of this blog.  But somehow, I've gotten back into the yo-yo cycle.

And I know that it's not healthy.  I know it's healthier to be obese and stay obese than it is to yo-yo up and down for a decade.  I need to get out of the yo-yo cycle.

I'm ready to focus on healthy eating.

One reason that I'm convinced the program that I want to try is Eat to Live is that I'm convinced that Dr. Fuhrman is not telling me what I WANT to hear.  Nope, he's telling me what I NEED to hear, which is that in order to get over the addiction to less nutrient dense foods (cookies, chips, ice cream, etc) and in order to achieve optimal health, I need to eat mostly plants and mostly whole foods.

I'm ready to take the plunge. 

Thanks for following me on this journey!

And I'm not quite ready to share the number on the scale with you guys yet.  Just know that it's pretty bad.  And that I'm not sorry to have stepped on it.  Also, it didn't depress me.  It just made me realize that I need to stop the binges and start Eat to Live before I gain back everything.

P.S. Please keep my doggie sister Rose in your thoughts and prayers.  She's not doing so well.

Eat to Live!

Hello, everyone!  I have been in a rut lately with my diet and exercise.  I feel like I'm trying to combine several plans at once, despite ultimately trying to let go of dieting altogether.

Most days start out with a goal of intuitive eating, but by lunch I'm tracking on My Fitness Pal to make sure that I didn't over do it and that I still have plenty of calories left for the second half of the day.  Then, by the time I go to bed I say "screw it" and end up back to an all-or-nothing approach to food and either overeat on junk that is lying around the house OR go to bed hungry because I ate over 2000 calories before dinner. 

So...  I have decided to start a more structured plan again.  And why not try to do something completely, 100% different than anything I've already tried?  While I'm at it, why not try to be the healthiest vegan that I can be?

Enter: Eat to Live by Joel Fuhrman.  This is basically a non-counting, whole foods, low-calorie (even though I won't be calorie counting, I know this is true about this plan), low-fat (ditto), very restrictive plan.  It's basically the opposite of what I'm currently doing.

My book just arrived in the mail today, and of course I immediately flipped to the "how to" section.  It's all about a six week plan that everyone who follows Eat to Live is supposed to start with.  After the 6 weeks, it apparently gets less restrictive, allowing more whole grains and a "cheat" day.  But here is the basic plan for the first 6 weeks-

Eat to Live - 6 Week Plan
(in the book on pg. 216, also found here on Fat Free Vegan)

UNLIMITED

Eat as much as you want:

• all raw non-starchy vegetables (goal: 1 lb daily)
• cooked green and non-green nutrient-rich vegetables (goal: 1 lb. daily)
• beans, legumes, bean sprouts, and tofu (goal: at least 1 cup daily)
• fresh fruits (at least 4 daily)

LIMITED

• cooked starchy vegetables OR whole grains (up to 1 cup daily)
• raw nuts and seeds (up to 1 ounce daily)
• avocado (up to 2 ounces daily)
• dried fruit (up to 2 tablespoons daily)
• ground flaxseeds (up to 1 tablespoon daily)

OFF-LIMITS

• dairy products
• animal products
• between-meal snacks
• fruit juice
• oils

 There also appears to be a limit to caffeine and all processed foods, even though that's not really spelled out in the "official" rules.  I am going to read the book the whole way through before I start, and will tell you all anything that I find particularly fascinating or important.  Also, if there is something in here that I find too good to be true, I will point that out too.

"Lose up to 20 pounds in 6 weeks!!!" seems to be a theme, which I know sounds hokey and impossible.  Since I'm not weighing myself, I don't really care about that claim.  I just want to fit into some 12's again, and I want to be the healthiest version of me possible.  If this plan works for those goals, they YAY! 

What do you guys think? 

Have you ever tried such a restrictive plan,

and if so, did you have success?

Things I'm enjoying lately

I think it's been a while since I'm recommended stuff to you guys.  So here's a post about some foods and other products that I have been enjoying recently!

1) my new Osterizer blender!  Stacey and I got this as a gift at his office holiday party, and I've recently re-found my love for green monster smoothies.  DELICIOUS and nutritious.

2) True Lemon powder packets.  100% natural, no artificial sweetners, and still only 5 calories, just like crystal lite.  I get enough artificial sweetners with my diet soda and sugar free syrup, so I figure that I should cut it out where I can.  And I love this stuff!  Delicious.  They also make one in raspberry lemonade.

3) Belvita breakfast cookies.  I must confess that I have not tried them as breakfast yet, so I don't know about the claim that they keep you full, but they are yummy as a snack. 

4) Good 'n Natural food bar in peanut butter!  This is my new favorite breakfast through the school week.  It's delicious, portable, and keeps me satisfied until lunch.  It tastes like a healthy version of my Grandpa's fudge!  YUM.

5) Did I say that all of these would be healthy?  #5 is cocoa puffs!  Also known as an awesome vegan chocolate option.  :-)  And only 100 calories for every 3/4 cup, so not too shabby for chocolately goodness.

6)  and finally, Perrier sparkling water.  I don't drink this often because it's usually expensive, but when it's on sale I stock up because I love this stuff.  It makes me feel fancy.

So those are just a few things that are making my life easier and yummier these days.  I hope you enjoyed the list!  :-)

One more thing I'm enjoying-

Here I am in my brand new scarf which I won over on my friend Jennifer's blog!  She made it herself, which is talent that I cannot even imagine.  Thanks again, Jennifer.  It's beautiful and oh-so-soft!

Rejecting the Diet Mentality (again)

Once again, I have been working on rejecting the diet mentality that plagues me.

And yes, THIS time "it will stick".  At least... I hope so.

Every day is a struggle right now.  I just wanted to be honest with you guys on here, because that's what I try to do.  That's what this blog is about.

It's about really putting myself out there, especially in regards to diet, exercise, weight, healthy eating, and things like that.

Every morning, I wake up happy to start a new day, with the infamous "clean slate".

Because every night, I'm overeating.  Or eating the "wrong" things.  Or both.

...and that cycle needs to stop, now. 

Because I'm terrified of re-gain.  I know that I'm not weighing myself right now, so it's possible that I've gained back more.  My pants say otherwise, in fact they are starting to fall off (the 14's may fit again now, will try them on this weekend!) but I'm still scared that I'm gaining weight.

I don't want to worry about my weight.  Some days I tell myself that I should be okay as a size 16 (which is hard to even type) as long as I'm healthy and happy.

...but that's a lie.  I want to be THIN.  I want to be SKINNY.  I want to look like Sarah Michelle Gellar (or insert your favorite super-skinny celeb name here).

So I control my portions.  I've been tracking on My Fitness Pal sporadically.  I exercise almost every day, usually for about an hour, usually all cardio.

And I'm having all of these "I want to be thin by MAY" thoughts (I'm going to NYC for vacation again, yay!) all the while trying to stay out of the diet mentality and developing an eating-healthy-by-day-but-overeating-every-night habit. 

I know one thing for sure:  The solution is NOT me getting back on the scale.  That's the one part of my new post-dieting lifestyle that I love and refuse to give up.

So here's what I'm going to do-

1) I will try on those size 14's tonight and see how they are fitting. 

2) I will try to solve my overeating every night habit.  Perhaps by eating a larger dinner, later at night, or by splitting dinner into two meals, one around 5 and another around 9.

3) I will continue to keep my portions in check by tracking some days on My Fitness Pal... but not every day, because I'm still trying to transition to a life without tracking.

4) I will journal. If not on this blog, then privately.  I have lots of thought that need to be put to paper, and most of them probably wouldn't interest you guys.  The ones that are relevant to the themes of my blog will probably end up here.  So get ready for some more "dear diary" type entries.

5) I will continue my kick-ass exercise routine.

And that's all for today!  Just wanted to check in with you all, and let you know that I'm struggling a bit.  Or a lot, depends on the moment. 

Phew, I feel better now.  Anything that you want to get off your chest?  Please feel free to share in the comments or to email me leahthekindweightwatcher@gmail.com

and the winner is...

I did the whole random.org thing again (so much easier than names in a hat!) and there is now an officialy winner to my Ellen and Portia book giveaway!!!
I'm thrilled to announce that it's someone who I've known through the blogging and Weight Watchers world for a long while, and who I consider a friend.  :-)

...and the winner is......................










Cyn from TheChunkyGoddess.com!

If you don't already read her blog, you should definately check it out.  She's REAL.  And has awesome shoes.  And takes really amazing pictures. 

(I didn't get permission to use this photo... Oops!)

YAY!

Cyn, please email me your mailing address and I'll get these out to you (through Amazon) soon.
leahthekindweightwatcher@gmail.com

Everyone else, thanks for entering!  I will do another giveaway soon enough, so don't be too sad that you didn't win this time around.  :-)

I promise to do a "real" post again soon, but for now I have to get back to studying.