Monday, November 5, 2012

Naturally Thin?

Is anyone truly naturally thin?  Are there folks out there who eat only when hungry and only until satisfied, and to whom that behavior just comes... naturally?

I am so jealous.
Yes I know that SMG probably isn't naturally thin,
but the character of Buffy Summers totally is.  Yes, I'm crazy.

Because, as much as I have tried to be one of them, I'm not.

But here I go again, giving this intuitive eating thing a try.  But only for one week this time!  Possibly two, if I think that I'm getting the hang of it by Saturday.

I'm still doing the "one week at a time" approach to dieting, and so far it's working out.

This week (which started on Saturday for me, as all of my weight loss weeks do), I'm doing Intuitive Eating/"Diets Don't Work".  I will still be focusing on getting plenty of sleep, drinking plenty of water, and doing plenty of exercise.  But I will not be tracking my food.

Instead, I will be just listening to my hunger signals.  Which is tough.  This may require me to eat with the TV turned off, which is a huge struggle for me.  I do think that if I ever want to truly learn to listen to my hunger signals that the TV will have to go off while I eat, at least for awhile.

I think that alone would result in my eating a LOT less, because I truly enjoy eating while watching TV and if that's not available to me, why would I overeat, sitting alone without the company of the TV?  Trying to truly enjoy THE FOOD instead of enjoying THE TV and mindlessly eating the "food" (I tend to mostly eat "franken-foods" while I watch TV).

Anyway, here I go again, on another attempt at being an intuitive eater.  But this time, it's not a true attempt, because I fully plan to go back to using MFP within a week or two.  I think that the pressure of "forever" the last times that I tried IE got to me.  One week at a time, even with IE, will hopefully be just what I need.

Will I ever be naturally thin?  I actually do believe that I will be.  But it may still be a few years away.  It is a goal of mine still, and I will NEVER give up on that goal.  Just like my goal to move to NYC, I will have to make and stick to a plan in order to make it happen; it won't happen just because I want it to.  Through trial and error, practicing IE, and never giving up, I will one day be my version of naturally thin.

What is my version of naturally thin?  The next paragraph is how I want to eat some day:

I eat whatever I want, no restrictions.  However, because of years of working healthy diets, I will usually turn towards healthy and whole options because that is just what my body wants and what I crave.  Food has absolutely no moral meaning to me.  I eat a Kit-Kat bar just like I eat a Green Monster:  because it tastes good and it's what my body craves.  Also, I eat only when hungry and I always stop before I get uncomfortably full.  There may be special occasions when that previous sentence doesn't apply, and I will on those special days sometimes overeat, but I will feel no guilt about it and easily go right back to listening to my hunger signals.  I have worn the same jeans size for  years, because my weight no longer fluctuates.  I got down to my healthy weight and have been able to easily stay there, because now I'm naturally thin.

Notice that nowhere in there did I say my weight or pants size.  To me, naturally thin is not about a specific number.  It's more about the behavior and how comfortable I am in my own skin.  If I could do all of the above at my current weight, then by my definition I would be naturally thin.

Anyway, that still seems like a fairy-tale most of the time.  Because of years of disordered eating and dieting and hating my body's appearance, it may be awhile before I get there.  But I will get there, don't  you worry. It will take a long time, and plenty of ups and downs, but I will be naturally thin one day.

Here are last week's stats:

Weight Update
week three start weight: 200.0
end of week three weight: 199.0
total weight loss for week: 1 pounds
total weight loss since 28th birthday (10/07/12): 5.4 pounds

I love when Diva relaxes so hard that she literally smiles!

What are your long-term goals when it comes to
diet and exercise?  

4 comments: said...

I totally agree with not assigning a number to weight loss/natural size.

I am struggling with that too at the moment.

Good for you for your perseverance.

Shanny said...

I'd like to think that I am naturally thin... it just doesn't show in my exterior lol

It's a tough one, I don't think I ever will be, no matter how much I try it will always be a struggle, I'm too weak. Like you said though perseverance and pleny of work should do the trick... keep at it darling, keep at it..

Cyn Knight said...

i'm definitely not naturally thin... and i know i never will be.
i know that if i want to lose more weight or at least maintain, i am going to have to track and be conscious of what i eat forever.

i would love for it to be differently but in 42 1/2 years it has always been something i have had to work at and i am okay with that!


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